SALEM, NEBRASKA
A woman on a popular website made a dramatic announcement, shocking dozens of fans who read and comment on her posts. The website, where she was considered one of the most prolific and controversial authors, she claims, was unable to protect her from other people’s opinions of her.
Her writings, which would often attract the attention of as many as 200 of the 5 million site members have been lauded as “recent,” “something to read” and “repetitive, but not in a bad way.”
The decision to leave promoted a long farewell post, detailing how messages in her inbox have slowly destroyed her life, everything she cares about, and left a vacuum in her soul that can only be filled with bitterness and self-pity.
“It was epic,” said MaryMcMary, a 24 year old submissive woman, “when she left there was a huge outcry. People, literally, cried out. It was epic.”
Even her detractors, said they were sorry to see her leave. Well known Internet troll PZ1H lamented, “I have no idea what I am going to do with my mornings now. Usually they have been spent typing long inflammatory posts which get deleted immediately in response to people who post, well, about anything. I responded daily to hers, now I have a 45 minute block of my day with nothing to do.”
The departure was short lived. Upon hearing that there were a huge number of posts discussing her departure, she suddenly became aware that she couldn’t read them, having left the site.
“It was a real pickle,” she told the Daily Flogger, “On one hand, I promised to leave. On the other, people were talking about me. I was the center of attention and couldn’t even enjoy it. Ultimately, I decided it was better for me to return.”
Things seem back to normal at the website, as everyone has fallen back in their traditional roles of whining, complaining, protesting, trolling, and threatening to leave, boycott and protest until something is done.
The website owner was unable to be reached for an interview but did respond by email saying, “It is just nice to see everyone bickering again. That is why I created the website in the first place.”
